Sick as a Dog and Science Project

I had big intentions for this weekend. It is not often that Derek and I have two days in a row that are not filled with work, school, kids and other obligations and commitments. I know this is true for almost everyone, but it seems with the added restrictions that our school schedules put on things that we do not have a lot of time for one another. Making time for each other is so important and so much more important in a relatively new relationship. So, I had planned that we would spend time together, possibly make one of those semi-spontaneous trips that we have been known to do. If not, at least we would go to dinner and the movies.

Instead...I was an "incubus of virial plague" as Miranda Priestly would say. I quote the dragon lady because while I was home sick all weekend, "The Devil Wears Prada" was running on HBO in what appeared to be a "Devil" marathon. I'll admit I watched it at least three times. I was struck on Saturday night with the common cold. My only question is, if it is so "common" why is it so severe. I couldn't breath. I was coughing insessently. I had a stuffy nose. I was achy and didn't feel like doing anything. I felt so bad and I felt bad for feeling bad. I kept apologizing to Derek all weekend as he was bringing me Kleenex, medicine and checking my forehead for a temperature each time I would ask "do I have a fever?" He even went as far as going to the store twice in one day because I was looking for a special kind of Vick's Vapor Rub that I had seen on a commercial a while ago. It is a lotion instead of the gooey petroleum jelly kind. He didn't find it, but did find the petroleum jelly and rubbed it on the bottoms of my feet. (It is something I read in one of those forwarded e-mails and as far as I can tell it was no miracle cure!) I am still sick, but I will survive.

So, the Science Project. At 4:30 p.m. on Monday night we receive a telephone call from Micaela's mom. She has to go to work, Micaela's step dad is sick and Micaela just told them that she has a science project due tomorrow that she hasn't started, does not have the supplies for and no one is available to help her. Derek hangs up with her and tells me that he plans to go pick up Micaela, bring her back to our house where she can do her science project and spend the night. This frustrates me. Micaela is bailed out each time she puts herself in this situation. In my view, she should suffer a few consequences for her choices, and hopefully with a few of this consequences, even though they may cause displeasure for her, she will choose differently the next time. Even if she doesn't choose differently, at least she will learn that there are consequences for her actions, rather than the lesson that there will always be someone to bail you out when you are in trouble. I get that our children should know that they can count on us, but I also believe that they shouldn't take that for granted. I feared as Derek drove away to pick her up that she would feel as if she were being rewarded for doing her project late: an extra visit with Daddy and Kerie, alone, without the other four children, three adults and three dogs that are packed out of necessity into her other home. It turns out, I was right. While we were working on her project late into the evening she actually said to me that she was kinda glad that her she waited to the last minute to do her project because she was having fun. This reinforced my frustration, but we were not in a position to really address it at that moment, except to say that doing her homework while being rushed and under the gun was not a reward, it does have consequences and we will talk more about what those will be this weekend when we are scheduled to have her for a visit. Last night, it was all business. Homework, dinner, shower, pack lunch, brush teeth, go to bed. I just want her to learn this lesson now rather than later.