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Wednesday, May 28, 2008

Procrastination and Insomnia

So, usually my titles are random, but I believe that these two terms are inter-related. I am currently taking two more classes at the undergraduate level to fulfill requirements for my Bachelor's degree in Literature at ASU. Still not enrolled at ASU and still telling people that I will be in a couple of semesters. Even I am at the "I'll believe it when I see it" stage in this ongoing and seemingly endless dialogue, but that's a different topic for a different day. Today, I am reporting that I had a homework assignment due last night. It was nothing major, just a typical read a chapter, read an article, complete some minor assignments at the end and write a thoughtful paragraph about the chapter that enhances my learning. Whatever. I did not do any work for this class all week long and feigned the excuse of being sick...it was pathetic even for me. So, I started the coursework at 10:00 p.m. and submitted the assignment right on the button of midnight. I am such a procrastinator, and I do what most procrastinators I know do and convince myself that "I do better work under a deadline." I just don't like the feeling of pushing myself that way and each time I do it, I tell myself that I won't do it next time, but even as I write this I don't believe that. I wonder what can break the cycle of procrastination for me. What is blocking that break through?

Insomnia. So, once I was finished with my homework, I tried to calm my mind and told myself that I would watch a few mintues of TV to "wind down" (I am not good at transitioning to sleep) before trying to go to bed. This seemed to make me weary, so I settled into bed beside Derek who was already a-snore and tried to put myself to sleep. Of course, I woke him with my coughing, tossing and turning. After what felt like at least a half an hour of this nonsense, I got up, took my pillows and headed back for the couch. But, even here I couldn't sleep. I did the dishes and tried to wind down again by watching a boring movie. The last time I remember the hour on the clock it was after 3:00 a.m. Derek woke me at 5:45 a.m. before he got into the shower and helped me back to bed, where I was able to rest until my alarm at 6:45 a.m. Did I create this pattern? What did I do to myself to create my insomnia. I didn't drink Caffeine late at night. I didn't eat (which surprises me as much as it does you). How can I stop the insomnia?

1 comments:

Mommy Meryl said...

I'm sorry to hear you were so sick!! Wow dinner with us and this is what happens! Oy!

On another note - welcome to parenthood. I hear what you are saying, but ultimately she is probably not going to learn the lesson you are speaking of because she is only 11 and it would frustrate you more if she doesn't turn her work in then it would her.

And trust me - the teacher would wonder what kind of parents she has that the kid doesn't turn in homework. Then the parent says they didn't know. Then the teacher says how in the world does the parent not know?

Its a whole mental cycle. Sorry I can't be of much help here except to empathize with you. :-)